A Call to Mission

I have a friend who was born to an impoverished family in one of the less developed towns in Batangas. Though his family struggles hard to make ends meet, he was able to study in Manila. He, including other beneficiaries, was able to complete high school and college because a generous heart half way across the globe made it possible. I knew people who help others when the need arises, but when I knew about his benefactor, Jan Eric, I became enlightened about consistently helping others until they fulfill a dream and be self-sustaining.

Moving on to one of those lazy afternoons of "thesis research" in a sunny farm in Bulacan, I told PJ and all the trees and crops around that I want to be a philanthropist. I want to be like Jan Eric, a philanthropist.

How noble and proud it did sound with a moment of silence punctuating it. All Pj could say was, "wow! ako rin," as another silence followed. Our eyes were glistening as we look through the fields day dreaming. And when dreaming silently was too much to handle on our own, we excitedly told each other our plans and how benevolent we will be.

From that point on, I was constantly in a dilemma whether to save up to help or to splurge for my whims. Financing a child's education require a lot of money and back then, I only have my allowance and occasional monetary gifts to depend on. I thought of working right after college, but decided getting a title before my name will make things easier in a way. Finance is indeed a problem, but I soon realized it is not the only problem. To whom and where to channel my heart's investment is another thing to worry about.

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On one of my aimless walkings at the mall, I saw an interestingly orange booth. Anyone would notice as it is strategically placed at the mall entrance. I would have just passed by, but curiosity told me to ask around. So I did, and I left the booth wearing a big smile.

Through World Vision Philippines I can send a child to school for only fifteen pesos a day or four hundred fifty pesos a month. That's just about or even less than the cost of spending for a dinner in a resto and chatting over coffee after. Fifteen pesos a day is just a little over the amount I spend for ice cream or the tricycle fare from our subdivision's gate to our house. I can send a child to school by saving fifteen pesos everyday. I can send a child to school with my very own allowance. It was so do-able I signed up that very day.

Making a commitment to sponsor a child made me feel my life has become of value. I am able to help my sponsored child, Marjorie, pave a way to a bright future. Moreover, my monthly donation is also used to help her community through sustainable development projects of World Vision. Fifteen pesos a day is not a lot of money and with just a bit of sacrifice, I am able to help a child and a community.

Marjorie, a nine year old who walks across three rivers to her school and back, sends me a letter once in a while. She'll be telling me a bit about herself and her family and she will always be thanking me for helping her. Reading her letters has always made me smile and has kept me inspired. I studied harder for the licensure exams because of her. I was thinking it would be a shame as her educational sponsor if I fail the exams. I was also thinking about easily finding a job and receiving better compensation if I pass. More income would mean a bigger chance to help other kids like Marjorie. If I can finance a child's education with my allowance, I can do the same for more children with my income.

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I passed the exams, but just the same I had difficulty landing on a job. I took various how-to's and business seminars to kill time or hopefully fire up an entrepreneur in me. In a seminar I attended, I became classmates with a mother and son from the Marcos clan. It was an interesting experience brushing elbows with the bloodline of who I consider to be the country's best president. Indeed it was interesting, and irritating as it soon turned out.

During the start of the seminar, we were asked to write down our dreams as vivid as possible and then briefly tell the group about it. I told them about getting rich and sponsoring the education of as many children as possible. The mother and son told us about getting rich and leaving a legacy to their family. The class discussion was normal except for the heated discussion running in my head at the same time.

It would not have been a big deal to me if the Marcoses didn't put so much stress on the legacy they want for their family. Talk about getting rich and leaving a rich legacy to their already rich family. They sounded so concerned when we brushed up on the issue of children not getting education because of poverty. I don't understand how pitiful they were to those children and then defiantly declared their rich dreams solely devoted to their already rich family. How can they only think about their family who eats three or more lavish meals a day, has luxury cars and who has high paying jobs? How can they only think about their family who can very well help themselves? All the more irritating was how missus repeatedly said, "For the family. For the family." Knowing these kind of people, it's no wonder why the rich become richer and the poor stay poor.

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I am now a regular employee at a small but promising company. My superiors said I have a bright future with the company. I do believe them, and I just hope I have the same confidence towards my noble dream.

At the seminar, I wrote about wanting to sponsor 25 children in 5 years. I don't know where the numbers came from. I don't know if it's feasible. I just aimed blindly at the future and wrote about my dream as detailed as I can. I wrote it with a cup of sincerity, my usual brimming cup of arrogance, a tinge of doubt, and a whole lot of hope.

It took me almost a year before sponsoring Junry, and I've been contemplating hard if I should commit to child #3. I should have five children every year as my goal's timetable dictated, but unfortunately there are things holding me back.

I won't be a hypocrite to say there was not a time when I wish I could just forget about the children. Sometimes I wish I could keep all my hard earned money to myself. Sometimes I wish I can scream at my bosses about their promise and demand a million pesos cash advance. Sometimes I blame myself for ever telling Pj and all the trees and crops about my dream. Sometimes I blame my ego for writing about the 25 children.

I'm finding it harder to sacrifice my wants and other dreams for this particular goal. I brush aside the guilt I feel every time I purchase something for myself, trying to find solace on the thought, "Minsan lang to," or "Para sa akin naman." But still guilt gnaws my soul. It saddens me that I lack the means and the will power to achieve my goal.

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I did dream to help as many children as possible but I did not dream to be a saint or a martyr who is selflessly dedicated to others. In fact, I am just an arrogant fool who wants to do good in the hope of making up for all the wrong I've done and will be doing. And I am the same arrogant fool who is sick of seeing people living in the ditches and seeing rich people eat even their own priceless shit. Most of all, I'm tired of hearing people pity the poor and say they want to help but pathetically do nothing.

More than a year has passed since I first signed up at the World Vision booth. It took me that long before resigning to the fact that I can not achieve my ultimate goal the way I planned it to. I have also resigned to the fact that I can not take forgranted my other goals in life. Though being finally aware of these circumstances, I will not give up hope for my dream and these children's dreams. I have a renewed belief that I can achieve it. And I will, through the help of other people.

I guess I was never lacking with the means to achieve my goal. I was just too proud to accept my limitations and too selfish to do everything on my own. I know there are a lot of people who want to help the less privileged. I also know a number of opportunities to do so. Making people aware of these opportunities and asking them to participate in the cause is, I believe -as I have realized- the next best thing to do.

I no longer want to be a philathropist like Jan Eric or like Rio Diaz and her husband who have shouldered the educational expenses of all students from a particular school. I just want to help as many children as I can, may it be through me or through other people's help. I will continue striving to support Marjorie, Junry, child #3, #4, and how ever many my resources permit whilst praying that I will be able to move other people to do the same.

Sometimes the answer to a problem is a simple solution such as asking other people for help. It has been a selfish desire to carry all the load when I could tap the hearts of those who are willing to do the same. If you are one of these people, please click either links below to start doing your share. Help me fulfill my ultimate goal. Help me help the little angels. And when you have commited to do so, please let me know. I'll be so happy knowing you are one among the handful who have proactive souls and generous hearts.

World Vision Philippines
Hands on Manila